I am a hypocrite. It's Easter Sunday, and the only thing I've done is to spend 15 minutes looking around my house for eggs full of candy. Where has my childhood gone? I remember the days when we would get up early, creep downstairs in our pajamas, and be regaled with amazing sights. There would be eggs to find (of course we had spent the week before dying the eggs, "dying" what a strange word, in fantastic pastel colors), and the Easter bunny would put stickers around where we ate dinner, like a place mat. After a great breakfast, we would dress in our absolutely beautiful floral print dresses (with white gloves for some), get into the car, and drive to church for a few hours of listening to the greatness of God, and seeing everybody else in their own beautiful floral print dresses for the girls, and suits for the boys.

We STILL believed in the Easter bunny. I honestly thought for years that the creature that I saw in the mall was the same one that came into my house, and hid my eggs. I wasn't thinking, "...Wait... if an unknown creature comes into my house, isn't that breaking and entering?" or " How does the Easter bunny get all that money for candy? Does he run a non-profit organization, like Bunnies 'R Us?" The truest quote in the world is, "Ignorance is bliss." We never thought of the what-if questions that more and more plague our lives as we age. We were happy with the fact that we could expect to be surprised every year. In fact, it was almost like we demanded to be mystified. We didn't want to know that the Easter Bunny is some 30 year old guy who couldn't find a job anywhere else with an unshaven face, who smokes during his breaks. The Easter Bunny was a pink creature that always smiled, and loved to see all the children in the store. He would hop-hop-hop to every house delivering that little bit of joy to every girl and boy (sounds like Santa almost... oh my god I'm starting to sound like Dr. Seuss).

Now, I have no faith in the creature that I used to love. My sister stills tries to hold on to the mystery of it, but the "older and wiser" big sister knows better.... or wishes she didn't. The ideals of our childhood that there are unicorns, dragons, the Easter bunny, Santa Claus, and even things like "When I'll grow up, I'll be president." have slowly faded from our lives because of the harsh world. Our parents try to get us to believe in Santa Claus, and then say at the world laughs and says... "Are you serious"

Okay, back to the reason why I'm a hypocrite. It's because if people ask, then I say I'm a Catholic, yet I never go to mass and support my church. I guess if dire times came upon us, then I would go to church. Does that mean that I'm a "fair-weather believer?" (For those of you non-sports people, it refers to a fair-weather fan who only support a team if they are doing well) To celebrate the event that symbolizes the Christian faith, I went to a movie, and we are going to eat a nice meal so that right there tells you that I'm a good Catholic... Oh well... not everyone's perfect. Although, I wish I was.

That's another ironic thing. The more I try to be perfect, the more obstacles are shoved in my face (which is just another example of the world laughing in my face... So, NP, you want to be perfect... well then lets see... Car accident next Wed. Ha how will you get to sports then.... ha you'll fail a test in three weeks.. there went your gpa.) With every extra effort at being perfect 10 more distractions are put in your path. Oh well... yet another fun happy holiday.

PS I went to see Ella Enchanted, about 2.99 yawns (almost three). Totally different from the book.. A little upset about that. But surprisingly interesting. For a kids movie. Final Question: "Would you choose to stay in childhood forever?" BL. NP.